Provocation #3 March 12th 2023 – Come Home Journal #10
A provocation is a challenging question, our third was:
This provocation followed an intimate screening. Together we shared a collective screen encounter to instigate conversation. Meeting after, we talked about how we can long for something we have never been part of. The feeling that we are connected despite our lack of connection. Is it ancestry, bloodlines, country or birth?
For Jane it was an understanding that her many years living here, in this country, had not dimmed, nor were likely to dim, her feelings for home. She has many homes. She is able to contain a feeling of being in both places at once. Without a fear of loss.
Marcia talked of a sense that Ireland was carried with her through her family and her many visits to perform. The pandemic had not been kind, having to go home from a cancelled tour. She longs to connect again. She plays me the music they made together for the tour. Her music has touched a deep place of longing. I can hear it.
Pam sends me words. She hopes they help to explain her feelings and longing for home.
To belong. To be held up. Held down. Held out, held back.
You change the space to allow me in; just so, you belong to me. I change my shape to fit in; so, I belong to you.
We belong together only when we both agree this is the case. In Wales, you are named after your house, you know where you belong. You know your place.
To be: finite.
To long: infinite.
By Pam Swanborough